Bringing up baby

grrrr… that programme is on again…. I really want to smack this woman round the face and I’m really not a violent person at all

What to say what to say…..

Been an interesting day today. Can’t say much about it cos it’s work but suffice to add that it’s been a piss poor day for some people.. but at least they should get a good pay off option…

The girls are getting better, hopefully that bug is no more. Ella is still ever so slightly coughing and snuffly but nothing she can’t handle really. She’s now just got her incredibly bad bum rash again … she screamed and screamed at the weekend when I was changing her nappy.. I feel so bad for her. You have to talk to her and reassure her the whole time you’re cleaning her up so she won’t go into meltdown and then quickly pick her up as soon as you’ve finished so that she knows you’re not trying to torture her.. teething. It’s just not fun.

And speaking of screaming… what on earth is that channel 4 programme all about..?!?! Leave a baby in the garden for 3 hours whilst you sit inside and drink tea?? Get them sleeping through the night at 2 weeks by depriving them of food in the day so they are starving at nighttime and therefore sleep longer!??!

I KNOW!!!!!!! Babies, right, they are dead inconvenient, yeah? So what you should do if you accidentally get one is treat it like shit and make it unhappy and leave it to cry when it needs you because basically, right, the most important thing is that you get your social life, your sex life and your sleep back..
Stuff the baby… just ignore it! If they’re crying they’re just trying to manipulate you into giving them affection. Those damn newborn babies they’re so Machiavellian… fancy wanting warmth and tenderness?!What are you? A .. baby… ah-yes.. you are…. oh… you ARE! hmmmm just hang on a sec while I check my manual…..

God! Makes me angry. Send that woman back to the 1950s if that’s when it was so popular

I was kind of prepared for interrupted sleep when I had babies. I did kind of look into it beforehand AND I seem to recall reading somewhere once that when you have kids they do tend to need food when they need it…. I think they do grow out of it though… right?

Rant over…

BreastFeeding Debate *Ducks and runs*

Oooh I’m venturing into territory here that I may regret.. I’m daring to sit on the fence-ish for something but I have some opinions I want to get out and I don’t want to air it all in comments on other people’s blogs …

Yes this is a post about breastfeeding. Now look. Before anybody gets all jumpy on my little self I am not against breastfeeding. I am not against bfing in public and I am not against children who need to be fed being fed wherever they are hungry, whenever they are hungry.

I am not however, like the Queen of Spain, about to post a picture of my breasts full frontal on my blog. Not that I think people can’t do exactly as they wish on their personal space but….

My stance is this.

Why is it that whenever people have a rigid or particularly strong view, where they insist others must consider them and not be narrow minded – that they seem to be the ones that will not consider others’ points of view or perspectives and are equally unyielding?

I am not personally offended by bfing women in public.

I have no issue sitting next to someone who is bfing in public, I will not cause a scene if someone begins to feed their child next to me, nor would I move or inwardly vomit with disgust at the child getting some lunch. Maggie Gyllenhaal is totally within her rights to feed her baby as far as I’m concerned wherever and whenever.

But. Some really do have an issue with this. Some people do find it offensive or if not offensive, some people ask that if you want to bf in public that you try to do it with discretion.

I have to say I don’t really see the issue here.

Bfing mothers want people to consider their rights to feed their child, their child’s right to feed and basically their feelings regarding this matter.

But it seems to be to me.. that when the others ask for consideration for the opposite e.g. I feel uncomfortable if someone does bfeed in front of me or I’m embarrassed or whatever .. they are told to suck it.

Breasts make milk. You get pregnant and they make milk. It’s what they’re there for. They make milk for the baby to drink. It’s no big deal.

Bfeeders :- some are not able to get a grip with reality on this and feel it’s disgusting or wrong or revolting or whatever.. So just let them get on with it.

Why can it not just be that people make an effort to co-exist?

Does someone have to be ‘wrong’ or could we not just recognise that everyone including Jenny Ha Ha has the right to their opinion? Even if it isn’t yours.

Why order people to suck it? Why insist that everyone has to accept breastfeeding in public even if they find it uncomfortable? Why make breastfeeding mothers feel unwelcome because they are feeding their child in a cafe or on a park bench? Why make everyone’s lives harder by complaining that a mother is feeding her baby when it could be you to move? Why rub people’s faces in something they don’t like though, just because they don’t agree with you?

Why can’t people just try to exist in the same place without forcing their opinions on others?

It’s the same with so many contentious issues.. you never … well OK not never.. but hardly ever see two people with opposing views on a controversial subject say ‘well OK we feel differently about this..’ it’s always ramming opinions down others’ throats and insisting they are ‘wrong’ and they should accept you’re right.

I (personally) don’t think it’s beyond the realms of possibility to attempt some discretion when you’re feeding your baby in public (considering the feelings of those who may not be that WOOHOO about it) just as I don’t think it’s beyond the realms of possibility or reasonable behaviour to accept that babies need to be fed and to knuckle down and get on with it. Or move. Don’t look. Walk on by.

I don’t want to follow a God or go to a church but every Saturday in town I have to walk past a man who tells me my children are going to Hell because we’re not married.

I don’t want to consider black/African/ Asian (insert whatever here) citizens ’sub standard’ humans but every last weekend of the month I have to walk past the bloke asking me to buy the BNP newspaper. I told him in no uncertain terms last time “ABSOLUTELY NOT!’

I am proud to say that I acknowledge that people have differing opinions on a wide range of subjects and I respect those that allow me to have mine without making me feel abnormal, sad, sick or ‘wrong’ and I don’t really have tons of respect for those that berate me for not being like minded.

Just live and let live guys… and you know what people that do think BFing in public is sick and wrong are never going to listen to you, they’ll just ogle the pictures of your breasts and move on…

Sorry but that’s the truth.

Peter Andre has Meningitis

But at least Katie has her business head screwed on tight!

No comment … [on my personal life you scum bag reporters] except perhaps .. for a million pounds…

A million no less… not £100,000 not half a million but A Million.

Clever girl…

I would criticise her except I can’t help feel that this is what got Katie where she is today… much more financially secure than me for a start!!

People that drink Rosé…

I was thinking as I watched a repeat of Jamie Oliver’s Naked Chef tonight…. Why?

White or red..? It’s a simple choice.. you have to make a simple choice.. white.. or red?

How indecisive do you have to be to pick … Pink!?!

Really…

And it tastes naff!!

Can I just ask..?

If you can use the cameras to decide on technical queries in a rugby match.. then why can’t you use them in football..?

I really enjoyed watching the ref in the rugby at the weekend being told that the footage had been watched and …yes.. the try could be awarded..!

Excellent!

Seriously.

Good decision I thought.

So why. Why?

Why can they not use the cameras in football to decide whether or not a goal can be allowed …? Or to decide whether a player is being a complete pathetic ponce, whilst rolling around on the floor, grabbing and grasping at the wrong ankle he just hasn’t been kicked in .. to try and stop his opponent getting a goal he rightly deserves..?

Why not?

Why not dammit?!??!

Use the technology. It’s there! It would take 5 seconds and stop shed loads of football related injustice and make the game much fairer and so much less ridiculous.

Although, I have to admit.. it would be disappointing to miss out on the grown men rolling around like injured toddlers when they bump their knees..

UM OMG YUK!!

When I was writing the post before.. I was originally going to do a picture of a facial expression… gross or eugh!

I was looking for a piccie that I liked and I typed in Yuk on Google image..

The second photo in….

UM…. OMG YUK!!!

They really weren’t kidding when they said yuk..

My instant reaction was a kind of blurt of laughter followed by a quick cover of my eyes and pointing the laptop straight at BN to make him go blurgh as well!!

I was laughing out loud!!

OMG YUK!!!!

Go on I dare ya..

But don’t say I didn’t warn ya!!

Smoking in public places.. yes?… or no..?

After reading Jenny’s post about smoking in public places in America, I left a comment. But even halfway through my marathon comment I realised that I would have to write a post about it.

Smoking kills? Does it not? Smoking is also very bad for us even if it does not kill us. Right?

Lung cancer. Throat cancer. Mouth cancer. Low fertility. Bad skin, hair, teeth. Etc.

Smoking has suffered a reduction in venues lately and now is not only banned in a variety of states in America but also now in Scotland and more I would think. This is a spur of the moment post, not a researched one so feel free to correct me if you feel inclined to do so.

So. Smoking is a killer. Smoking even kills those around us who do not smoke. It kills our children, cot death and associated cancers. It can even attack them before they are born, premature labour, low birth weights etc. and yet we have people complaining that they can’t do it around others.

‘I don’t just want to kill myself, I want to harm others too, please!’

Sure. Freedom. Choice. Freedom of choice. Smoke if you want to. Kill your own family if you choose. Watch your skin wrinkle and turn to leather and see those beautiful bags develop around your eyes while your mouth puckers into a cat’s bum.

Beautiful.

But don’t kill me. Don’t kill my kids.

If you’re that desperate to have a fag that you can’t even go an evening without one then as I said at Jenny’s, stay at home, use your oven, cook your own meal, get a bottle of wine and invite some friends round that want to die too.

Smoking and non-smoking divides in restaurants are such a load of shit. BN and I went out for a meal not so long ago and spent an hour in the local pub before we got a call home to a screaming baby (bummer) and after 60 minutes or so in a ‘non-smoking’ area, we stank.

Absolutley stank.

I don’t even smoke and I could probably have given a smoker a hit from breathing in the air through my left sleeve.

So I say ‘YAY’ to no more smoking in public places.

Freedom of choice?

Bollocks to you. It’s your choice to do it in the first place. That is your choice.

Will it really be that inconvenient to do it in your own home?

Besides – when you’re on oxygen and you can barely walk or breathe, your home is the only place you’ll be able to do it anyway .. so you may as well get used to it!

Now I’m not one for..

the news really.. but another news story has grabbed my attention. Not in a rant rant rah rah kind of way you may be glad to hear but in a passing interest kind of way.

Hilary Clinton has finally announced her intention to run for president in 2008.

This means it appears as though America will have two Democrat candidates to choose from in the run up to the 2008 elections. A woman. And a black guy with ‘wow factor’,Barack Obama.

Now .. I don’t know every American, granted. Who does? But I have a sneaky feeling.. there’ll be a fair few who aren’t gonna be happy about this.

I wish they could both win!!

Would anybody like my uterus?

I was out and about this morning, reading my blogs as per usual and caught up with PeskyMac, one I read pretty often. I haven’t been there for a while but came across pesky’s post on uterine transplant that has hit the news recently.

I, like her, have also read the news lately and came across this story, had a few little thoughts about it and then stored it away in my brain someplace for ‘things that I learnt recently’ and didn’t really think about it again to be honest.

However, the comments on her post amazed me and dumbfounded me to my very core – yes to my core! I can’t believe that I share this world with people so judgemental and negatively opinionated on others and what other people have to go through.

There is actually a comment on this post from a person who thinks that people wanting kids of their own is a bit stupid really cos let’s face it we all look the same anyway. I mean seriously? I had to read it a few times to see if I could spot the wink or something that may give away a hint of reality or humour.

Er.. isn’t that the point of a species?

To grow, develop, procreate and prolong it’s existence and propel itself into the next generation and the next, ultimately more equipped to deal with whatever may come it’s way?

I mean hello? Opposable thumbs? Creatures that can apparently disappear into their background to protect themselves from being eaten by a predator?

We’re evolving.

We’re becoming cleverer and cleverer and sure, yes controversially so – but isn’t that more of the same point? That we *can* debate and discuss and compromise where others fight it out to the death if they don’t see eye to eye? Because we *have* moved on?

Ultimately I feel this is where people like this are coming from. Change? Heck, shove change. Let’s all stay the same until we die in our caves eating our raw meat.

I mean yes, adoption sure, but what I’m *hinting* (not so subtly) at is that THIS is the reason why people want to have children. It’s because it’s innate to procreate.

No?

Not because it’s a fancy whim that some women happen across and decide to give it a go. One woman actually comments she finds the whole ‘ “Wah wah, I want to experience the miracle of childbirth and have a baby that looks like me!!” thing to be supremely stupid.’

Oh yeah it’s dumb.

I mean jeez, what on earth would a species want with kids that actually carry their own DNA?

Is IVF wrong? Is the saving of premature babies wrong? Is the treatment of disease wrong? I mean here are instances of us interfering with ‘nature’s plan’ but I don’t see anyone complaining when their wife/husband/mum/dad is saved from a heart attack. Or *their* child is treated for CF or saved after premature delivery or a difficult delivery when it may need oxygen etc. etc.
I mean “don’t make any offers” says one comment …”major surgery is major surgery…” Yeah, you’re so right, we probably *should* put a stop to all the bone marrow transplants and kidney donations out there anyway. I mean I know they’re expendable to a certain extent and can be donated without the need for death but that is major surgery and we should really think about that before we offer to help anyone again lest they should appear in the dead of night and whip it out whilst we’re not looking.

Isn’t uterine donation just another development in a long line of biological and scientific developments. Yes, it surely deserves debate? But not judgement.

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awesome. so one more child can go unadopted. says Sarah

so, if the uterus isn’t yours, and it has to be fertilized with an embryo transplant, and then the uterus is removed after ferilization to stave off rejection, how is the baby even hers?

Posted by sarah on 01/17 at 02:57 PM
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..incidentally – quick lesson for you Sarah, eggs are fertilized, embryos are implanted. They already are fertilized hence embryo. An embryo is the developing cells that *become* a foetus.
Also whilst I’m on the educating path – may I just add that the uterus itself doesn’t actually add anything genetically *to* the baby. Just checking as I don’t really see whether the uterus is hers or not has any bearing (!) on whether the child is genetically related to the assisted pregnant woman.

In 1954, controversy surrounded the first ever kidney transplant – but now that’s practically commonplace. I mean the kidney’s not really theirs though, right? So how is that justifiable or worth bothering about investigating? Can’t he just sit next to a dialysis machine for the rest of his shortened life? I mean that’s the same as having your own kidney. Isn’t it?

Don’t judge people for wanting their own children. It’s not fair if you have never even been in the position of knowing you can’t have your own. You are ignorant to how it really feels, as am I, and therefore I think not in a position to question their need.

Surrogacy would obviously not be in these guys’ remit either. It would after all be far too much trouble and presumably pointless to carry a baby for someone in a uterus that wasn’t theirs anyway. How would the child even *be* theirs if she didn’t even carry the baby or God forbid, didn’t have viable eggs of her own so implanted the surrogate with her husband’s semen?

I mean why would any man, let alone a woman, want a child genetically connected to them

So, be careful, you out there. Don’t make any offers anyone. Don’t think about helping anyone in case they actually take you up on it.

It reminds me of that Friends episode – no groans please, I have warned you …

Monica says how she thinks it’s great that Phoebe is offering surrogacy for her brother and his wife and asks Rachel if she would ever do it for her.

“Suuuurre” says Rachel “..of course…. you’re not asking though are you?”

“no!” says Monica “course not”

“Well then yeah, suuuurrrre. Course I would” We and the audience laughs obviously because it’s embarrassing in it’s humour.

Is this the honesty of what people really feel though? I’ll offer to help someone but I won’t really mean it and hopefully the sentiment of offering should be enough??

Read Gekko’s comment on Pesky’s post. Spot on. Absolutely. Why don’t we just stop this freedom bollocks and just right all the problems we have and control procreation altogether?

Please don’t get me wrong. Let there be no misunderstanding.
I am totally understanding (and am in awe of) anybody that adopts or fosters or uses surrogacy for children for whatever reason they may have – there are surely too many for me to even contemplate on this post. I applaud couples or singles that take children into their life whether they already have some of their own or whether they are doing it *because* they can’t have any of their own.

What I’m saying is, when my life is said and done and the opportunity is there for someone to benefit from my organs, whether it be my heart, lungs or my uterus then please, let it be known by more than just my husband to be, that I want that to happen.

Wholeheartedly… so to speak.